Hilarious Facebook Status Updates

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I don't know about you, but I've thought about running away more as an adult than I ever did as a child. I saw a hipster wearing socks because its so cold. Funny Add background Gothic Bokeh Chalkboard Cliffs Grass Sky Hearts Paper +3 Share . 40 2 ←Rate 12-24-2017 18:25 by UncleBSolomon Comments (2) . 3. 29 0 ←Rate 01-05-2018 19:54 Comments (0) . The post will be considered for the Hall Of Fame!. (Danny Coleiro) - I'm so glad none of my friends are smart enough to find this page! (Alicia Smith) - I don't mean to be negative but - (SamGirl Sunday) Visit my FACEBOOK PAGE tomorrow for more vintage status updates! Or, don't. (Todd Landon Wildig) - Hey, drunk! I'm Facebook friends! (MY STATUS IS BADDEST) - I fold down my laptop screen very slowly at night so I don't squish you guys. Funny : 10Not Funny : 25. 6 0 ←Rate 01-08-2018 09:33 Comments (0) . Beer is good, but beers are better. (Karanbir Singh Tinna) - I just drew a jelly smile on my toast with a squeeze bottle but I still don't believe it is happy. Cashier: Would you like your milk in a bag? Me: No, let's just keep it in the carton, ok? . and if im lucky i get some during the day Kaine in Funny Add background Gothic Bokeh Chalkboard Cliffs Grass Sky Hearts Paper +18 Share Im a social vegan. Lots of people are drinking exsessively and letting their wives drive. Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Sunday, 12.31.17 15:41pm. 2. Funny : 29Not Funny : 27. I was freezing. Site Links Home Funny Status Messages Status Message Generator Chuck Norris Sayings Funny Dumb Laws Funny Humourus Quotes Depressing Quotes Recent Famous Quotes Wifi Names Great Deals TJ's Blog Companies that Suck About Tjshome Contact Us Privacy 1999 - 2018 Tjshome.com. (Shafique Khatri) -1. 27 1 ←Rate 01-02-2018 20:13 Comments (0) . 8 0 ←Rate 01-06-2018 01:11 Comments (0) . Funny : 40Not Funny : 30. I mean we were together for 3 1/2 seasons!Funny19 Insightful-1 WTF?8 GTFO!16 #16800XyuppiThe downside of being a bomb disposal technician. Funny Facebook Statuses. Next Page → . The last thing people should feel going into the new year is alone.Funny12 Insightful13 WTF?28 GTFO!17 #16801My girlfriend broke up with me because she says I was obsessed with football. Big bad stoner wolf, probably (Tim TheStache) - I only tip cows if their service is outstanding. That sound you hear when you already closed the cupboard & hear something fall -yeah, thats the sound of someone elses problem. 10 0 ←Rate 01-07-2018 23:08 by Depirts Comments (0) . (William Hale) - 10:54am and I'm already naked and wearing a cowbell. Since when does 2 to 4 inches of snow become a winter storm warning? Back when I was a kid, we just called flurries, and we complained it wasn't enough to even have a good snowball fight, let along close schools. Jingle all the way. But the real ones are so much better. :< (Mike Seriously) - The awkward moment when youre trying to get over someone you never even dated. (Jack Olivar) - Does it make you uncomfortable that I wear your profile pic in a locket around my neck? (Toni Daniels) -I have never lowered a pair of mini-blinds evenly, not even one time.How the hell do they expect me to raise these children? (Lee Greenspan) - I don't think first three letters in diet are accidental. characters left Read the Rules 5a02188284

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on Jan 09, 18